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On Death.

4/24/2014

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There are messengers all around us.

I am not sure what they all mean or even what they all are, what I do know is that certain things grab our attention and make themselves present when we need to see them in our lives. For instance, in the past couple of months, I have had a funeral procession drive by me about six times. I don’t remember the last time this happened in my life but for some reason it is happening now. It has happened the last two days in a row. I know this means something, I can feel it intuitively and I am almost afraid to connect with what it can truly mean. 

And, I sit with this not knowing. 
 
Additionally, there have been quite a few individuals that have taken their lives in the last month and some that have passed suddenly and unexpectedly and this too, I sit with….I sit with the horror, the pain, the devastation, the silence………and the release. 
 
Death is such a peculiar thing, it is so mysterious. We avoid or deny that all things come to an end. It is one of those things that is hard to hold in our heads, so we don’t. We avoid talking about it and thinking about it, who really wants to talk about death? Much less, who wants to think about all of their loved ones in time will pass, themselves included. We will all come to an end. 
 
I ask you, when that time comes, will you have lived? Will you have loved? Will you have followed your dreams? Will you have walked to the edge? 

Will you have lived your one wild and precious life?

My hope for you is that you answer yes. Open your eyes to the messengers...they are indeed all around us.

Love,
Melissa

Melissa Hedlund, MCAT, ATR-BC, LCPC, is Executive Director & Co-Founder of The Light of The Heart and President of the Illinois Art Therapy Association.


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I can't even draw a straight line!

4/12/2014

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During Open Studio Art Making at Culture Stock this past month, we created scribble drawings.  This is a commonly used art therapy technique that can be done by anyone of any age.  Scribble drawings are relaxing and can help us to focus our attention on the present moment.

As a lifelong artist, I have grown up hearing comments from others such as, “I can’t draw,” “I’m a terrible artist,” or “I can’t even draw a straight line!” 

When it comes to art, how often do we hear others saying things like this? And, how often do we find ourselves saying the same things?  One of the beautiful things about art therapy is that anyone can benefit, regardless of their artistic abilities.  Scribble drawings are a great way for those who feel they have little artistic skill to experience the benefits of art making.  Because a scribble is not perfect, and there is no right or wrong way to make one, we are less likely to judge ourselves, leaving us free to enjoy the process of creating.

We had a rather large group for this particular Open Studio session.  The adults in attendance had varying amounts of previous experience with the arts.  Some were already a bit familiar with the technique, and all reported that they enjoyed the activity.  The children in attendance did a wonderful job with this activity as well.  Some created several drawings, while others spent more time adding lots of detail to one drawing.  The artwork that resulted was filled with beautiful colors, lines, and images.  This was such a positive, warm, and welcoming group of individuals.  I am grateful to everyone that attended, not only for their participation, but also for the conversations and suggestions that came from making art together.

~Lisa Kolodziej
2014 MAT Candidate, Saint Mary of the Woods College
TLOTH Clinical Intern


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Positive Discipline Works

4/2/2014

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Throughout the month of March, we spent Friday mornings at Family
Focus conducting a parent education group on Positive Discipline (www.positivediscipline.com) with moms in the Parent Mentoring Program. These strong, intelligent, and kind women shared stories of pain and frustration.  Over the course of four weeks, they were able to learn and test new ways of interacting with their children.  Perhaps without realizing it, many of the women had already been using Positive Discipline techniques.  
 

We co-led the discussions each week, focusing on a variety of topics such as encouragement versus praise, consequences versus punishment, and how to talk to children with both firmness and kindness. They encouraged each other with stories of their successes and found relief in seeing what they could change and how. Some women spoke predominantly Spanish; the mothers helped each other understand the concepts and translate between English and Spanish. We also gained valuable insights about family values and parenting styles in Latino/a
culture. 

It was amazing how quickly the group formed a close and cohesive unit, and in the last session the women
expressed their gratitude for having a safe place to discuss these issues. They appreciated being able to get to know the other women better and developing a new support system.

It was an honor and privilege to hear their stories and share in their journeys.  We heard one woman talk about how she tries to put herself in her adolescent son’s shoes when she wants to react, another share how she learned to
respond to her 2-year old and 14-year old fighting with love and patience versus frustration, and several women talk about wanting to parent differently than they were parented.  What a gift to be able to offer that space for these women pause and reflect on their roles as mothers and parents in a new way.

We hope and believe that the discussions we had during those four weeks will stay with these wonderful women, and that they their relationships with their children will continue to grow and blossom.

~Carla & Briana
TLOTH Clinical Interns
2014 MAT Candidates

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